Any parent who thinks she has her kid’s life under control is delusional. So is any parent who thinks A+B=C, or Christian Principles + Good Parenting = Perfect Kids. It can be shocking and unsettling to personally experience the shattering of these delusions when your child makes life-impacting decisions that are disappointing.
You may feel guilty, like you messed up your kid, analyzing your parenting flaws and taking it personally. You may be thinking things would have been different if you’d been a better parent. Brenda Garrison, author/ speaker and mother, reminds that it is your child who makes the decisions. Even if you feel like you contributed to the fray, you are not the cause. In her book Love No Matter What: When Your Kids Make Decisions You Don’t Agree With, she provides encouragement and shows how your response can either drive your child away or draw her closer.
Brenda Garrison divides those disappointing decisions into categories: 1) your preferences, 2) foolish decisions, and 3) immoral or illegal decisions. Regardless of the category, we can control how we respond. She shares common mistakes that parents make that put a distance between them and their children. She candidly shares her own reaction errors and allows space for her young adult daughter to interject her thoughts and her side of the story so that maybe you can wrap your head around what your child may be thinking. A study guide at the back of the book also provokes further evaluation of the material with your own struggles.
Most important, Brenda Garrison is practical, showing you how to move forward building bridges instead of brick walls and exercising healthy boundaries. This book is full of illustrations and is a quick and easy read. Insightful and encouraging, this book is specifically geared toward parents of college-age/young adult children.
Disclaimer: I received a complimentary copy of this book from Thomas Nelson Publishing in exchange for my honest review.
My kids are all out of the house (one in still in college), but I still enjoy reading books like this. We are still involved in our kids lives, even when they are raised. Also, there is the matter of grandkids (which we hope to have in a couple of years). I appreciate your book reviews.
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